Friday, November 2, 2012

Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Endorses R&B Hall: Half of the Inductees Leave!

Most of you know my stance on the "alleged" Rock and Roll Hall of Fame: it is a sham outfit pandering to the lowest common denominator of mass-marketed demagoguery, it is more interested in filling seats for its interminable induction ceremonies at thousands of dollars a table, and it is not in the least interested in perpetuating the idea of "rock" or "rock and roll" as a distinct genre of music.

On the contrary, The Hall of Homogenized Muzak has tried for years to rewrite history, attempting to foist a contrived inclusiveness for every musical genre known to mankind under the impossibly broad umbrella of "rock and roll", offering a blanket definition of rock and roll for everything, including R&B, disco, hip-hop, gangsta rap, country and blues (the Hall originally listed blues and country performers as "early influences", which makes historical sense, but for years they've simply just rolled them in with the rock and roll inductees as one in the same, which makes no sense at all and ignores the artists' musical context altogether!).

This cynical revisionism allows The Rolling Stone Magazine and its publisher Jann Wenner (who is the evil puppet-master controlling the secret voting machinations of the Hall) to sell more magazines while giving the appearance of remaining relevant in the modern era. This is particularly important to them because the rag has lost any relevance as a rock and roll periodical decades ago. One wonders what Hunter S. Thompson would say about this tawdry magazine filled to overflowing with fashion and fragrance ads. No wonder why he blew his brains out!

So, you can imagine my delight at the delicious irony I found in reading the following headline:

Rock N Roll Hall of Fame Endorses the R&B Music Hall of Fame

Cleveland, Ohio –– The Official R&B Music Hall of Fame Museum LLC, today announced that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Museum President & CEO Terry Stewart is giving his support to establish the Official R&B Music Hall of Fame Museum in the City of Cleveland...
 Ummm...huh?. Now, let me get this straight. The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame has been ignoring actual rock bands and performers for years (like Deep Purple, Rush, The Moody Blues, Jethro Tull, Stevie Ray Vaughan, Dick Dale, Cat Stevens, Kiss, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Yes, King Crimson, etc.), while annually inducting performers who never considered themselves rock performers, and whose music was never considered rock and roll in the charts or by any reviewer. EVER! Wait, it gets better.

You may well ask who will be the R&B performers inducted in the inaugural ceremonies of the Official R&B Music Hall of Fame Museum (henceforth referred to here as the R&B Hall of Fame). Well, here is the list:

Michael Jackson
Whitney Houston
Aretha Franklin
James Brown
The Temptations
Otis Redding
The O'Jays
Gerald Levert

Of these eight performers, six have been inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall. Only Whitney Houston and Gerald Levert are not members of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (but Gerald Levert's father, Eddie, is in the Hall as a member of the O'Jays). Who do you think will be inducted next year in the Second Annual R&B Hall of Fame induction? How about this list:

The Supremes
 The Four Tops
Smokey Robinson
The Jackson Five
Gladys Knight and the Pips
Martha and the Vandellas
LaVern Baker
Solomon Burke
Earth, Wind & Fire

Oh wait, this whole group of R&B performers have already been inducted into The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame! Does any of this make sense? Don't bother answering, it was a rhetorical question.

I don't think The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame truly comprehends the danger it is in! By endorsing the R&B Hall of Fame, The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame admits that there are specific and definite differences between R&B and Rock. Imagine that! Now imagine if forty or fifty performers who were previous rock and roll inductees leave for a real Hall of Fame that actually represents the music they have played and are known for worldwide. It would leave a tremendous hole in the RRHOF (and now we know how many holes it takes to fill that asinine Hall!).

Here is a sobering consideration: I will bet any amount of inflated Internet dollars that the R&B Hall of Fame will not induct Ozzy Osbourne, Alice Cooper, Led Zeppelin, The Who, The Beatles or The Rolling Stones. Why? BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT R&B PERFORMERS! Where is the logic in the RRHOF?

Good Lord! It is worse than I thought:

Beatles, Elvis, Sinatra Nominated For American Pop Music Hall of Fame 

CANONSBURG, Pa. (AP) -- The American Pop Music Hall of Fame won't be open until next summer, but the first round of nominees to be inducted into the western Pennsylvania-based hall have been announced. The Beatles, Elvis Presley and Frank Sinatra are among the top 40 nominees.
The upstart American Pop Music Hall of Fame, located in Canonsburg, PA (a suburb of Pittsburgh and an obvious music mecca), has just announced that 20 inductees will be enshrined in their Hall of Fame next year! The list includes The Beatles, Elvis Presley, Frank Sinatra, The Beach Boys, Tony Bennett, The Carpenters, Chubby Checker, Bobby Darin, Neil Diamond and Simon and Garfunkel. Please don't ask what The Beatles - who I am quite sure are British - are doing in an American Pop Music Hall with all the American acts. These Halls do have their issues.

Think of the calamity if, eventually, The Blues Hall of Fame in Memphis, TN demands that the Rock and Roll Hall return Muddy Waters, Robert Johnson, Willie Dixon and B.B King to their rightful Hall! They might even want dibs on Eric Clapton! Quite soon there will be no one left in The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame! The fact that The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame so seldom inducts actual rock groups will certainly leave the pickings pretty slim for an inductee list.

Perhaps they should get a new set of parameters. Or close completely.

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